As an artist, the most frequent question asked of me is "So do you do art fairs?". Up until this summer I had always avoided what I believed to be the lowest form of art; the summer art fair.

I know I probably sound like a snob, an art snob. But, there is an unwritten code among artists that once you delve into the gutter of the summer art fair, there is no return. You are stained for life with the fecal smell of pandering to the lowest of the low.

Ok, it may not be a 'real' code and there really is no smell of poo. But in the art circles I frequent, there are certain categories that art may reside and these categories rarely intersect.

At the highest echelon of public display of art resides the 'By Appointment Only' for profit gallery. These galleries are the pick of litter and cater to the wealthiest of the wealthy. They are an artist's wet dream and well above my stage of art expertise. Unfortunately at my age, I doubt I will ever see any of my artwork displayed in a gallery that is only open by appointment only. Nope, keep dreaming fucktard.

Slightly below the 'By Appointment Only' galleries are the 'Open During The Weekend Only' galleries. These galleries are for profit and only open during the weekend because they MAKE SO MUCH FUCKING MONEY!! I know, it's crazy that an art gallery could make so much money that they would not need to stay open during normal business hours. But that's how they roll. Now, I have been in shows in galleries that were only open on the weekend. But, they were different. The galleries that I have shown in that only open during the weekend, were only open during the weekend because they were going out of business and had to make pizzas during the rest of the week. They are two different things and as before, I doubt I will ever see my work displayed in a (very profitable) gallery that is open only during the weekend. It won't happen.

Lower down the ladder are regular 'for profit' galleries. These places are open  during normal business hours  Wednesday though Sunday. These places bust ass to make a dollar and are probably as high as I will ever go when it comes to displaying my art. I have had a number of shows in these types of institutions and I am very grateful for every minute my work was on their walls.

But, these shows are few and far between and will never pay daddy's rent.

From here, we delve into the 'Non Profit' arena.

Non-profit galleries are a very wide ranging group of categories. The highest of these are run by city art commissions and promote the idea of bring art to the masses. These tax exempt venues serve a very noble cause and I have been honored to have been asked to take part in a few of their showings. In one such show, I made a huge sale of two of my best pieces and when asked, I always say "YES, I WOULD BE HAPPY TO TAKE PART".

Dropping down a notch are the tax exempt galleries that work very hard to bring art to regional urban centers. Run by Board Members and high profile donors, these galleries play a valuable part in bringing an affordable art experience to the great unwashed masses while at the same time bringing a small amount of much needed cash to a few unwashed local artists. These venues have been the most profitable for me and where I have had the most public showings of my work. Most every show I have been asked to take part of in these types of venues has been a fantastic experience. Almost each show has been a collection of great artists and great works. Ok, I'm brown nosing it a little. Ok, alot. Fuck you, I need the money and if I burn the bridges this low, I may never get any higher. So, if brown nosing gets me shows, then I will wear a badge of shit for my entire life.

A few more rungs down the art ladder is the tax exempt, non profit, some dude has a dream gallery. These are the lowest of the legitimate galleries. Usually in an abandoned urban space or in some city owned building bought at auction and usually without heat, insurance, or full time staff. These venues offer little in the way of sales or marketing. Never expect a sale at one of these galleries and if you do get a sale, many do not 'do the whole bank thing' and may only offer cash or postal money order as way of compensation for sold art. But, rule of thumb, don't expect to sell work here. Many of my first shows were at places like these. I have fond memories of artwork hung in cold poorly lit rooms and miss-spelled labels. Good times.

Slightly below the realm of 'some dude running an art gallery in the basement of an abandoned church', we have that local bar or restaurant that believes that they could be a serious gallery too. If they didn't serve food and booze. These places are the true wild west of public art venues. Art becomes secondary to the Reuben on rye with fries instead of chips. Personally, I have been proud to have always drawn the line in the sand at this spot when it came to displaying my work publicly. It's not bad, it's just different. Fried food and my art do not mix. 'nuff said.

Wait, somewhere just above the dude who runs a restaurant that has art on it's walls is the MFA studio show. Public confession, I have taken part in one of these things. A Mongolian Cluster Fuck has better planning than the single MFA studio show I took part of and it is not my fondest memory of grad school. The minute I was asked by a fellow student, "Could you move your work? It's making mine look too orange", I knew I was truly in hell. Look, I still have problems speaking of it today without losing control of my faculties. The entire night was not ranked among my proudest moments and let us leave it at that and move on.

Well below the art gallery wanna-be restaurants and the MFA studio shows are the Summer Art Fairs. I feel bad about ranking them here because the average art fair artist busts ass to make every buck. I just wish they would bust ass to make every work of art. That being said, this summer I came to the conclusion that dish washing at Hooter's, part time teaching at my local community college and selling my shrinking toy collection on E-bay was not going to pay my rent. I needed more money. What if I could bring a real art experience to your average summer art fair? What if I could do all that AND make a huge amount of fucking money? Well, this is the summer I tried make some real scratch.